The Unteachables

It’s the teacher and the cop –
They’re the two you cannot stop
For they know so much they cannot tow the line.
When they’re doing money ‘right’
They are really quite a sight –
They can’t do it but they think they’re doing fine.

It was just a while ago
Saw a ladies’ baseball show
How some women in the wartime made some teams.
Was one woman who could pitch
But at bat they had to switch
Couldn’t hit the ball, or leave it, so it seems.

When I think back to grade one
We were used to having fun;
All us rascals would much rather be outside.
Teacher had red flaming hair
And her temper had a flair,
Took me well along the road to hating school.

Crabby lady in grade four
Should’ve booted out the door
Told me then I’d never univers’ty make.
Well, I’ve four degrees right now
Seem she missed the mark somehow
Liked the institution – staff I could not take.

Curious grade six and eight –
How things worked, and how to make;
Filled my mind much faster than the days in school.
Looked my favorite teacher up
Told me over nice tea-cup,
“I remember you – the curious one – no fool”

I could learn quite well my way
But in school I had to stay,
Suffered through long hours of quite ridiculous rules.
What I really learned quite well:
Teachers run their little hell –
I sat down but on the inside broke the rules.

At the Univers’ty gate
Dad said “just a moment, wait –
Great professors cannot teach, but they can learn.
So just watch out what they do
Find a way that works for you
Put your answers in a form they will not spurn”.

Many years have passed in fun
On my own learned since ’bout one,
Learning things is what I really like to do.
Experience for me is best
Skip the textbook and the test;
Systematic presentation helps me too.

Teachers learn another way
Experts light their world each day,
Most of us, alas, will never fit the bill.
If you not an expert are
In their mind you’re exiled far,
If you try to teach them factor in strong will.

People nice most teachers are;
Private, quiet, seem by far;
Do not like to lose their status in their field;
When they’re stopped they must save face
Like some king of human race;
If they can surmount that arrogance they yield.

I just wish that now and then
Teachers throw out their red pen,
I’ve no interest in their constant checking up.
If they’d just admit they’re wrong,
Be affirmative in song,
We’d be glad to help when finances get stuck.