So, well, here I am
This round cost me ’bout ten grand.
Not directly, no siree
Indirectly – you can see.
Question is, costs in and out
(Though they be, without a doubt),
‘Have I wrung from cancer there
More than it from me, compared’?
I said yes, at yesterday
When the last part I had paid.
Good thing too ’cause bottom hit
Slurping sound as bank I sipped.
More than those direct costs see
Indirect costs variously
Like those back through all this mess
Solving puzzle, without rest.
On the package-bomb red bow
Finish touch of wrapping so.
Out from sides and ends there be
Wires that trigger it in me.
When by chance I brush by one
Of those door bells, even some,
Off goes package, ‘BAM’, in me –
Package found a new way out –
Physical – weak cell, no doubt.
Cancer cell was not thrown off
Started growing (doctors scoffed).
But if not, then it would be
Something else that’s weak in me
Package here just had to go
Like way back, ‘I told you so’.
This thing’s festered deep in me
Only part of it could see
Just enough to let me know
This is bad so it must go.
Friend said, “epitaph for you I see:
‘Figured out it finally’ ”
That is true, though costs to me,
All but grave and headstone be.
But I’ve got some time now left
Bigger task for me to heft
Which I could not do before
Cancer knocked at my back door.
Gay parade the other day
Piles of people walked and swayed
Wondered if a float should be
‘Screwed by homosexuality’.
’Course that’s not correct these days
People say ‘be nice to gays’.
I’ve no problem with their life
But agendas cause me strife.
We’ve all got them – power based
Though some groups exempt disgrace:
Carte blanche – ‘They can do no wrong
For they press their cause along’.
But, that’s by-the-by to me
Small part really as I see.
When the picture larger’s viewed
My own juice is where I Stu-ed.
In this last press for my goal
Spending costs I let take toll
‘Not much matter at the end
Might as well just spend and spend.’
Bought me time, reduced my stress
‘List one-hundred’ and the rest.
Now I’ve got my answer clear:
Saw the time-bomb’s wiring near.
Gay agenda sub-plot is
To this other part of biz
So, in fact, my float should be
‘Helped by gays my pack-bomb see’:
If I’d not been screwed by them
My third picture would not rend
Peace inside me, make me look
At the wiring I mistook:
Sexualized at age of four
Raised Freud’s themes for me before
I’d the mental tools to deal
With that multi-onion peel.
Wove right through it all the way –
Culture’s base aligned not right
Left me powerless in my plight.
Once to culture got turned round
Power and lights could be turned on;
So this pack-bomb now I see
Wasn’t trouble – it was me.
Asked myself why You would care
I be turned to culture there.
Good for me and now I see
Other folks need Jubilee.
TCK stuff’s to me strange
But it paved the way for change.
Now I see this New World right:
Lacking power and without light.
Thought my job was power and light
(Giving aid and my insight).
It’s the wiring now of course:
Hooking culture as resource.
Then Your power and light can flow
Through their cultures – to them go.
Without that Freud could be right:
Sex, Death, Faith twist us uptight.
Mix of cultures in New Land,
TCK’s are seen at hand,
In this whirl cut from our base
Lots of us feel out of place.
What the mix of culture is
Doesn’t matter in this biz.
Figure out which one is home
Settle down, no more to roam.
Cost a lotta bucks to find
This small part for peace of mind.
Costa Rica’s for my son
Staying home, for me’s more fun.
As for junk that’s piled up high –
Took me here before I die.
‘Intermediates’ now I see
From here on, use low to me.
‘Precious pearl’ or ‘treasure’ lies –
Sold all else for this one prize.
Cost me all I had and am;
Now I understand The Man.
Red bow, on this package (me) –
Is the task that I can see:
Details will take working out
But ’bout wired-up-me – no doubt.
Gang of kids a slogan use,
Spray on walls as round they cruise:
“Cash rules everything around
Me” so ‘CREAM’ is slogan found.
Guess they from the adults stole
Concept to define their role.
Now I see throughout my strife
“Christ” not “Cash” defined my life.