McDee, The First Temptation

I see if I am going to be
The autodidactic named McDee,
I'll have to do my language school
Out on the field – and play the fool –

For learning language day by day
Is trial and error as the way –
Soon learn we to communicate
If we push on – don't hesitate.

There's pros and cons to either way –
I am autodidactic all the way
I use the formal ways and means
But as I wish – when value seems.

Perhaps it's better done that way
Come under load on early day
With integrated work and play
A photo-graphic tool, I'd say.

Since view of Heartland opened up
As focus in a larger rough
And ready view of Giver-land,
This focus I now under-stand.

Specific from the wider view,
Much clearer what I need to do;
As well what tasks to leave aside
As I repair where I reside.

The tempo of this work is clear –
Much slower now, it would appear,
For being on the Hill it is
Much simpler than that conquest biz.

“Go placidly” the poster old
Advised us youth when we were bold –
Works better now when energy
Has up and left – shifts “do” to “be”.

Discriminate – get out, get in –
Straightforward game, as photo's been;
So stay like that and carry on
Stay clear, and straight, away from wrong.

Fear motivates my outward walk
As I look round from present rock;
Like going out to clean that day
Long hours alone is part I'd say.

"A nickname, Stu, a pen-name used
To live behind – as puppets do
For sister in her children's plays –
Allows some space for adult days –

"Though here a chance to start again
And leave behind your former pain
And move on out – two names were given
Use second one when first is riven.

"So write and photograph with glee
Be what it is you want to be
The time's a ticking, move on out
And leave behind all former doubt."

Okay, I'll walk that road-way now
Let all the rest emerge somehow
Just like, “J. Allan” – writing name
And “Casil-Corp”  – it's all the same.

"More to the point the ‘Audie’ part –
So get to work and do your art
Learn on the run, and plug it in
Go venture forth – the trophy win."

              *****

But maybe that's the point I see
I can't stay straight and be McDee;
So best I nip it in the bud,
And Stu-Art be, and leave that crud.

How 'bout that ram in thicket, Lord?
When ‘Bud’ was nickname – short for word
(She peanut butter could not say –
So “Beedie-Budda”, was her way).

“Perhaps, but that was left behind
When shift was made to urban grind;
It came from Creenglish world up north –
You left it in that town, of course.

“More like that guy said, “Shut the door,
Then stuff you will not then explore –
Right at the first – it's always there,
So walk away – you can't prepare.

“Act when the door first opens up –
It's tough, but later it gets rough,
So do yourself a favour, man –
Just walk away, while walk you can.”

First Giants in the world we meet,
Are ones which caused our last defeat;
When we turn back to Promised Land
They still are there, they're first at hand.

So, heidie-ho, they're back I see,
Or maybe not, perhaps it's me –
The world's the same, it's not changed much
It's me, I should have known it such –

For, boundary-crosser I have been;
This land I've spied out, and have seen
Its promise and its challenge clear;
The difference – I now enter here.

So – better now, step back and pause
To clear up that distinction, ’cause
It later gets quite murky – see?
With Stu-Art go, and not McDee.

“It's honest, or no life at all
If one wants life that's spiritual;
There is a cost to precious things –
Just like the price of diamond rings –

“It's all a same – so walk it out –
An author's name – what's it about?
Do eight and nine, then walk the road –
Address the past for lighter load.

“No soft and easy way appears
To enter Promised Land (no fears);
Apart from Me, you'll wander 'round
That dusty patch of desert ground.

“So buckle up and face the foe
As into Promised Land you go;
Relax – I'm up ahead, you'll see –
Don't trust in Stu – rely on Me.”

Almost my foot had slipped, indeed,
Not with the fruit but with the seed;
I thank you for this caution, Lord –
I guess you're right – a goodly word.

“Step ten, it never goes away
Stay on your guard, let Me hold sway –
Each step as hard as other ones –
Impossible, hence, grace now comes.”

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